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Gamers' Central Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in the "Jaymark Malloy (Joshua Mallory)" journal:

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April 24th, 2017
11:08 am
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Move Aside, Cat!

I learned new vocabulary today: Schrodinger's Douchebag.

Schrodinger's douchebag is a person who says something offensive and is in a quantum state of being both kidding and serious about it until the statement is observed by an audience. If the audience is offended, he was kidding. If the audience was receptive, he was serious.

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April 13th, 2017
10:16 am
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Dictionaries For the Soul

Okay, I swear I'm not vagueposting here; this is just something I've been thinking about today.

Is there a word in any language for this concept:

"Becoming angry when being asked to do something inconvenient but completely reasonable"

If not, I think it's a word whose time has come. I've seen it happen to many people, and I've seen it in myself. I see it in the response to taxes and regulations, and it is a response that we tend to dismiss, pretend didn't happen, or call hypocritical. But is it really hypocritical if it's a nearly universal response? Humankind has a tendency to ignore ("turn a blind eye") or condemn ("projection") traits we don't like to see in ourselves, but maybe this is something we need to understand and process collectively, something like jealousy.

It does seem humanitarian to accept that inconvenience is aggrevating, even if the inconvenience is for the common good and even if the inconvenience isn't all that inconvenient.  From time to time, who doesn't say "the world is against me" for the flimsiest of reasons? But we can empathize with that impulse while still politely insisting that other people act accordingly. That's the essential element of society. We insist on inconveniences that seem reasonable, and over time we realize that some things that seemed reasonable actually aren't, and vice versa, and adjust accordingly.

A lot of times those adjustments in reasonableness can seem obvious in hindsight, which can be embarrassing. So, maybe we can add "embarrassed" to the "angry" in my proposed word definition above. Embarrassment is nearly anger directed inward, anyway.

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March 31st, 2017
03:59 pm
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Fellowship of the Wild

WARNING: This is going to be a little spoilery about Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild.

Role-playing ThoughtsCollapse )

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March 29th, 2017
01:26 pm
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No Fooling

When somebody asks me what’s my favorite holiday, if I am given sufficient time to think about it, I end up settling on April Fool’s Day.*  I like pranks when I’m in on the joke, and April Fool’s is the day that you really have no one but yourself to blame when you forget what day it is.

Specifically, though, I love the internet on April Fool’s.  I like how many websites throw up alternate wacky versions of themselves.  It reminds me of the olden days of the “World Wide Web”, when most websites were written by enthusiastic amateurs and it showed; no best practices and no search optimization.  It was an awful time; anything that was good was only good by accident--but it has a quaint nostalgia.

That said, in this topsy-turvy world of alternate facts and of political incorrectness run amok, I worry that April first will seem too much like every other day so far this year.  Internet, prove me wrong.

*When somebody asks me what my favorite holiday is and wants an answer right away, I usually say Christmas, because during the holiday season I forget April Fool’s exists and I like presents.

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March 7th, 2017
05:59 pm
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Always Such a Pleasure
I know I shouldn't get used to this, but both days last weekend somebody called us up out of the blue and wanted to hang out.  It's pretty flattering to know that there's people out there who like us enough to just want to hang out at the house with us.  It's hard to believe!

I'm taking an entire week off for my birthday this year, which is pretty super-exciting.  Work has been rough and I'm glad I have plenty of vacation days to do something like this from time to time.

Current Mood: relaxedrelaxed
Current Music: Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild - Ambient noises (in game)

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March 5th, 2017
03:53 pm
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Ponderance
My understanding is that you really can have anything you want in this life, as long as you are willing to give up everything else in exchange for it.  The trick is deciding what you are truly comfortable giving up, and what truly makes you happy.

Current Mood: relaxedrelaxed
Current Music: The dishwasher
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03:27 pm
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Switch! *snap*

Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild first impresssions:

In Breath of the Wild, Link has really unbelievable climbing ability, kind of like how Mario has his patently unbelievable jumping power.  It's incredible, both in the sense of not being credible and also in the sense of being wonderful.  Walls, trees, cliffs; Link can scale nearly everything in the game, and there are goodies and shortcuts to be had wherever you decide to climb.  The game has this intense verticality to it that encourages you to try to scale EVERYTHING, and it has an incredible freedom.

I feel like the climbing is a metaphor for the rest of the game.  That sense of freedom and exploration permeates everything.  It really does feel like a throwback to the original Legend of Zelda, except so much grander in scale.  Breath of the Wild feels like an extension of (and expansion of!) the design philosophy of Link Between Worlds, which is definitely the best Zelda game sinceLink to the Past... and maybe better thanLink to the Past.

I'll let you know if my opnion changes by the time I finish the game.

Current Mood: contentcontent
Current Music: Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild - Shrine (in game)
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February 5th, 2017
08:21 pm
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Introverts, Extroverts, and Introspectives
I have a very love-hate relationship with the concept of people.  I'm a pretty simple case.  I'm a 10-0 Introvert.  I do not gain energy from being around people.  Even if the people are doing something I love, like participating in a 24-hour gaming marathon.

(We participated in Extra Life this past year, by the way.  That was really cool.  We stayed up 24 hours playing cooperative video games, and a bunch of people came over throughout the day to support us.  Planning to do it again this year)

We've been hiding from people, trying to recharge our batteries from the big ball of stress that 2016 ended up being.  I don't think Steph's batteries are full yet, but she's already getting itchy for human company.  I never know when to encourage her to hide (like me) or reach out to folks.

(One of the reasons I haven't done as much journalling in the past few years is that I feel like Stephanie is the interesting one in our relationship, and she doesn't always like it when I journal about her. :) )

Me, I'm just hard to get to know because I'm so introverted.  I like people in the abstract, and I like specific individuals, but interacting with people is so messy and strange and painful for an asocial person like me.  Alcohol never served as a disinhibitor for me; I mean it works, but I'm not accustomed to it and even drunk I'm still not good at chatting with people.  Board games became a bridge too, but nowadays I spend much more time teaching people how to play a game instead of getting into the zone and making it a bonding experience.

That's what originally turned me to journaling; it became a wonderful way for me to interface with friends without all the awkwardness that is JAYMARK.  I miss that.  I miss my friends reading my journals and getting that deeper understanding of me; I miss reading my friends' journals and getting closer to them.  In the world of Facebook, I'm it appears personal journalling is a wave of the past, but I can always dream.

I've got much further to go if I actually aim to hit 52 posts this year.  Make them short and sweet.  Short and sweet.  I've just gotta hit my stride. Let's see what else I can do.

Current Mood: lazylazy
Current Music: Super Bowl LI crowds
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January 10th, 2017
07:21 pm
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Resetting 2017

Greetings!  I'm Josh.  A long, long time ago I started this blog as a way to chat with family and friends about my life in college without having to actually call and talk to them one at a time.  It gave me an outlet to vent about my frustrations and surprises, and I got to know a lot of interesting people.  Then, after a few years, people started to drift away from Livejournal for a variety of reasons...  Policy changes at LJ...  Migration towards Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram... Graduating from school and having jobs, children, and whatever else that leads toward having a more boring life and less time to write besides.


Well, you know what? I'm back.  The only thing I've consistently done on this blog in the past few years is my annual New Years meme, and it turns out I've actually lied on one of the questions this year.  I don't normally do New Year's Resolutions, but after some brainstorming with my wife, we've agreed to a few.  And one of them is: journal again.


So, I feel like I need to reintroduce myself to the world.  Hardly anyone reads my journal besides spider bots anymore and most of my current friends haven't touched their LJ in years, but maybe when I have a new body of work I will attract a few new followers.  So!  Allow me to tell you a little bit about myself.


I was born on the Ides of March in 1984.  That's not how I normally introduce it, but when you mention that your birthday is March 15 you quickly find out how much people know about Julius Caesar.


That makes me 32 years old currently, a fully-fledged adult by any measure.  I have a steady job, I am married, and as of yet I have no children, although you might not recognize that just by wandering around my house.  My passions, in order of acquisition, are video games, board games, anime, and my wife.  I fell in love with videogames at 4 years old, and with board games as a young child.  I stumbled across anime club during my first week of college and never looked back.  I met Stephanie during my Senior year, and got to know her over that summer and during my Super-senior year.


I'm one of those people who suspect they have Asperger's, although I've never been diagnosed (and I understand that diagnosis has been going out of vogue lately).  I'm weird and shy and I don't "people" well at all, but I am also polite, kind, gentle, and intellectual.


When I say intellectual, I mean that I devour subjects.  I usually end up with very little practical knowledge at the end of the process, but I love to learn anyway.


I can write some.  I haven't, for a while.  I am creative but I don't have a strong drive to create.  I am a computer programmer by trade (at a boring, regional insurance company in a city full of boring, regional insurance companies).  I have a double major in Computer Science and English.  I also have a minor in Asian Studies and a minor in Women and Gender Studies.


And now you know why it took me five years to finish college.


Why Women and Gender Studies?  Well, it's a long story, partially told in the archives of this journal.  (With a Live Journal account and friends-only access, you could read a lot more about it)  The shortest explanation is that I identify as androgynous--someone who is not gendered strongly as male or female.  Put another way, I reject traditional gender roles.  This was something I fully realized about myself in college, and it put my entire life up until then into perspective.  I do not go to church, but I was brought up Southern Baptist.  Now, the churches I grew up in were very liberal for Southern Baptist churches, the kind that actively debated whether or not to stay in the Southern Baptist Conference after the "great conservative takeover."  Still, we can say that gender identity was a foreign concept to me until I stumbled into the minefield.


It probably goes without saying that I am a very politically progressive person.  I cheer on LGBT causes and it gives me great pain that there is so much further to go before they will be totally accepted.  It frustrates me to listen to coworkers on the other side of the cubicle divider natter on about politics, but I know better than to get involved.


What else?  We have two cats; one is scared of strangers and the other hates strangers.  I listen to video game music more often than pop music, and we collect gorgeous nerdy art from anime/game conventions and kickstarter.  We have a board game room and a working arcade machine (Snow Bros, 1990).  And I've got 51 more journal posts to make this year, so leave some topic suggestions in the comments!


もう一度、よろしくお願いします

Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Current Music: Silent Hill 2 - Alone in the Town
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January 1st, 2017
07:40 pm
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Anime 2016
I already added favorite video games to my annual meme, but I feel like this can be separate. Just like last year, the bolded ones are ones I've seen before, but were new to her.  You'll see this year, we've pretty much only things that are new to me!  There are still a few on my list to subject her to, though...

Anime we completed this year:
Le Portrait de Petite Cossette
My Beautiful Girl Mari [Technically Korean]
No Game No Life
Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva
Psycho Pass Season 1
Rio Rainbow Gate!
Shiki
The Wallflower
Waiting in the Summer
When Marnie Was There
World of Narue
Yubisu: I Couldn't Become a Hero, So I Relucantly Decided to Get a Job
Yumeria
Zaion ~I Wish You Were Here~

Anime we are still working on:
Cowboy Bebop
Naruto

Current Mood: Comfy
Current Music: Final Fantasy VII - Let the Battles Begin! (in game... in Final Fantasy XV)

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